It's a residence hall NOT a dormitory - 13

There are only 28 days in February for a reason. It’s not because it makes the whole calendar thing work. It’s because February is crazy. Seriously, people go crazy in February. I think it’s because everyone feels like they need to cram things into the smallest month of the year. Lots of things have been crammed into my February schedule: undergraduate recruitment, graduate recruitment, internship stuff, two trips, papers, presentations, duty, events… But there’s one thing that’s been on my mind more than all of the others: placement for next year.

A lot of schools make grads change buildings every year so they can have a different experience. This isn’t the case at my institution and many grads choose to stay in the same building two years in a row. This year, we were encouraged to preference several buildings and after a lot of thought I put my current building first and another building I really like second (followed by another eight buildings I wasn’t very interested in). I talked to my supervisor a lot about placement and told her that while I was very interested in my second choice, I chose to put my current building first because she has been such a great mentor and supporter for me. Honestly, I know I’m a strong grad and would be flexible enough to be placed in any building on campus.

About two weeks ago, all of our supervisors got together and made placement decisions. Since then, we have all been nagging our supervisors to tell us placement but because one person hadn’t accepted, they couldn’t tell us. The more and more time I had to think, the less and less I wanted to stay in this building. I’ve had such a great experience here but I don’t think that another year would be the best for me professionally or developmentally.

Finally, last Monday I got a text from my supervisor saying she needed to speak with me and the two other grads in my building ASAP. I had no idea what the meeting was about and figured something happened in the building over the weekend that we all needed to know about. We met in the office and my supervisor dropped the bombshell. Her husband got a job in another state and she won’t be returning next year. She cried. I cried. Then, she told the other first-year grad I work with that he would be staying in our building and that I was supposed to be moving to my second-choice-turned-first-choice building. Now that she was leaving, however, she would be asking to keep both of us in the building. My heart sank a little but I didn’t say anything.

I went back to my apartment and kept thinking about the two buildings. Again, the more I thought about next year, the more I didn’t want to stay in this building. I would stay in the same apartment (the smallest on campus), work with one of the same grads, and sit at the same desk in the same office. I’m just ready for something new. At the same time, I have a lot of loyalty for this building which often gets a bad rap on campus. And I really didn’t want to let my supervisor down. After thinking about it all night, I decided I had to talk to my supervisor about how I was feeling.

The next morning, I went into her office and she said she wanted to talk to me about placement. She told me I would be staying here next year. I took a deep breath and said everything I needed to say. That I knew that my staying might be best for the building but wasn’t sure it was the best for me. That I have a lot of loyalty to the building and would work my ass off if I stayed but that I thought the other building might be the better choice for me. I could tell she was upset and she told me that she had thought about me when she was making the decision and thought I wouldn’t be as happy with the move as I thought. That I would be bored in the new building and I might struggle with a smaller staff and less friendly supervisor. She encouraged me to talk to the supervisor for the other building and get a better idea of what working there is like. She reminded me that everyone’s placement is tentative and I still could be moved. Now, I’m more confused than ever. I guess I just need to trust that I will have a great experience either way and that whatever happens is for a reason.

I know that the building I work in probably doesn’t seem that important, but for me I only have these two years to figure out what I want to do professionally and to learn as much as I can before my first professional job. Plus, it’s been really frustrating to watch everyone else celebrate getting their first choice placement and excitedly talking and planning for the next year while I still feel like I’m in limbo. To top it off, I’m really sad that my supervisor, who I’ve gotten so close to and has been the only real mentor for me at this big school, is leaving. It’s just a lot to think about.

On the bright side, there are only five days left in February.

Having a bad February day like me? Or just any kind of bad day? Visit fmylife.com--it's hilarious and will make you feel a little better about your own situation.

Takin' Care of Business #12

Alot has been going on in my life lately...

The whole interviewing for summer internships/practicums thing is over! I'm glad to say that from the 5 schools I talked to, I got at least one offer. I'll be going to Texas for 2 months for a NODA internship. Exciting stuff! I've never done summer orientation before, so this is going to be very new and interesting too.

This semester hasn't really set in for me. Though some of my classes were interesting to me when I read their titles, the course content has been fustrating. I hate going to class some days. My cohort has been scattered around to other classes (since now we have more liberty in choosing what classes to take), and now I'm having classes with 2nd year grads from my program as well as PhD students. I feel like I'm incompetent--again...same thing when I first started going to school here.

Then there is this other thing bugging me. I'm taking a class called "College Students and the Law" and we had to go attend this presentation at my campus about facebook, myspace, and the likes of that nature. The presenter [C.L. Lindsey] came to speak to our students in a presentation called "Online Trouble". I don't know how many times I've heard horror stories from my parents about not putting my personal information out there when I talk to strangers. They used to be very concerned about me wanting to "chat online" with friends. I was 18 at the time, and didn't know much about the world, and had internet access for the first time when I started going to college. Anyways, this guy showed us some pictures he found online of students from my campus underage drinking, playing beer pong, smoking weed, and things of that nature. He also told us of some people who "hooked up" over myspace and facebook--stories that ended with kidnap and murder. The othe big surprise was that he mentioned that it's easy to hack into people's myspace accounts, and that you can Google the instructions. My face went "??????" Also, the other thing that got me thinking--about 90,000 registered sex offenders got booted off of myspace for trying to pose as young kids. After that presentation, I contemplated deleting my myspace account. Not sure if I'm going to...I have to think it over some more.

The same thing is happening to me now. I'm being lectured constantly from people like my supervisor about what I put online. My supervisor called to my attention that I shouldn't be sharing my feelings abou summer internships on a public forum such as facebook. My supervisor says "Don't you remeber what C.L. Lindsey said in his presentation about employers checking people's facebook when they apply for jobs?" I was asked by someone about my status that day which was "...either way I'm heading back to the Lone Star State". The person asked "What's wrong with TX?" Someone else asked "Why are you moving to TX for?" (thinking that I was already done with grad school). When I replied I mentioned "I wasn't exactly aiming for the South this summer, but I'm glad I got an offer". The school that interviewed me that offered me the position...they asked during my interview why was their school #3 on my listing on the NODA website? If you're familiar with NODA, you're allowed to only pick 8 schools to apply to. To this school, #3 is high up there. And I did hold them high in standards as well. Why my boss is making a fuss over it, I have no clue? Then I limited the access of what he can see on my facebook. Not like I'm scared or anything because I have nothing to hide. I'm a good person, a good student, and a good employee...My facebook is clean. I've always had it that way. I was a student leader at my undergrad. I was a Greek and I was an RA. I know what kidn of things are not supposed to be on my profile. And it's not like I engaged in that kind of wild behavior anyways during college. I NEVER had pictures of me with alcohol or partying on my facebook. My profile has always been clean. If you would ever look my tagged pictures, the vast majority of them are of me dancing. Well...I was a dance minor. Anyone who knows me, knows that I love to dance. It says so on my profile. Now, it's not like I'm dancing up on poles or dancing on tables or things like that. Why should my pictures even cause any worry? Why would anyone want to take salsa dancing "out of context"?

At the end of last semester my classmates and I decided to have a bar crawl to celebrate our first semester completed. We made shirts and planned this out to the every possible detail. We asked ourselves about the "What ifs" and the "out of context" questions. We never mentioned what program we were, we never mentioned our institution on the shirt, we didn't invite anyone underage or who was an undergrad, we stayed away from places that undergrad students go to, we decided to have our bar crawl early during the day...we just made the mistake of taking pictures. We're grad students, ok? We don't get drunk anymore because we're too tired. Some of us were never big partyers anyways. The pictures got posted on facebook, none of them were bad. We had one picture of all of us raising our glasses to toast, we took other group photos with each other, some of them included glasses on the table of the restaurant/pubs and other places we visited. They were not bad at all. None of us really drink that much. Somehow, news of this got mentioned to the head of our department. Someone who is friends on facebook with them decided to snitch on us. Next Monday, the first year grads got an email from the head of out program asking us "whose idea was it? and that this was unethical and unprofessional behavior". I about hit the roof, because the pictures were not bad...we took a group photo, no glasses or drinks in our hands, but just because it says bar crawl on the shirt, you're going to get mad? Like really? I'm not 5 anymore. I'm not some child to be scolded at. Nonetheless, pictures were removed and untagged, our feelings a little hurt, some of us were angry, some of us didn't care because we didn't do anything wrong, some of us thought whether or not being in this field was worth it...alot of things went through our brains. It really did ruin my finals week at school.

On another note: Today I uploaded some photos from Valentine's Day. One of my neighbors (another grad) got married yesterday and I was invited to their mini reception at a restaurant. They had a DJ there playing music. Well, I took lots of pics of people dancing and things of that nature. I tagged some friends and new ones I had made at the reception. I got a message from one of the guys about taking down some pics of him dancing because he didn't want them floating in cyberspace. He mentioned how that was an "intimate" moment in his life and he didn't want his professors or his students to see them because they would take them "out of context". I understand his issue, but his photos were not bad. If he's getting down, I think there is no problem with that. I got lots of pictures where I'm doing that. It's not like he's dancing up on a table. Why do people have to freak out about this kind of stuff?

Well, I did as he requested...I deleted some of the photos he was in. I looked at my tagged photos. I had approximately 1,300 pictures of myself up on facebook. I see it as like my entire life is one there. Because I'm paranoid now with people telling me stuff about "out of context" I untagged myself from about 30 pictures: these included pictures of me where I didn't look cute, pictures of me with alcohol (a whopping total of two), and pictures of me dancing silly. I noticed I have lots of pictures of me at karaoke bars now (it's amongst my new hobbies). I don't think karaoke should be taken "out of context" despite the numerous ads for beers in the background of some of these photos. I'm at a bar, I don't have a drink in my hand--just a microphone...what do people think I'm supposed to do for fun around here? I'M 22!!!! I'm not going to sit at home at read all the time. My profile still is quite clean than other people I have seen (i.e. like some of my students).

Anyways: here's the dilemma...Despite facebook and all of its privacy settings that I already have imposed on it since way back when...and no matter how much I delete stuff from it...would I be better off without a profile to avoid any of these stupid comments from people about "Well, other professionals can take that out of context".

Should I get rid of my facebook? I'm thinking to myself "There is no way on God's earth I'm going to do that!" That's 4 years worth of my life that would be gone...4 years of building up a network, of keeping in touch with friends who are too busy to call, 4 years of good memories (the pictures), 4 years that it took to find classmates I used to be friends with in grade school, 4 years worth life--vanished (well, I don't know where my facebook info goes after it gets deleted). Should I just remove the tagged photos, the events, the groups, and photo albums from my profile and just leave the wall?

Technology, my friends, is going to be the demise of society...we have become so reliant on using the internet, our cell phones, TVs, radios, computers...when was the last time anyone wrote a letter by hand? You don't even have to send Holiday cards anymore, you can just click a button and send it as an email. The only phone number I remember on my cell phone is my parents' house, and my sister's cell phone (because she's my emergency contact person). Other than that...I don't know anyone's number by heart or have to look it up in an address book like in the old days. Technology is wonderful and great to contact people, to get things done faster, to entertain us...I just keep wondering about those people--other college students and myself--that check facebook several times a day? Honestly, what would I do without a facebook? I would have more time of my hands, but I'd be so lost. How will I know about my students' events? or campus events? or when my best friends are getting engaged? or someone had a relative who past away?

check this out

My boyfriend passed this Web site along to me and I think it could be really helpful to grads looking at internships or professional positions. The Web site has video tours of campuses all over the country and is very user friendly. It seems like the Web site may be fairly new so not all campuses or features are available yet, but I already found it to be useful!

Here's the link:

http://youniversitytv.com/beta/index.php


--It's a Res Hall Blogger

It's a residence hall NOT a dormitory - 12

Today is the big day.

7 a.m. I wake up feeling excited, nervous, worried. Luckily, I set my own office hours so I can go back to sleep. When I finally ignore the anxious feeling in my belly enough to go back to sleep, I dream that I get no offers.

9 a.m. I wake up again feeling disoriented but thankful that the dream is not reality. I’m nervous it might be an omen of things to come.

10:58 a.m. I’m watching MTV to try to calm my nerves and keep me distracted. I’m not sure that it’s working. Gs and Gents just isn’t my thing (But after ten minutes I’m rooting for Blue!)

10:59 a.m. I practice saying “hello” out loud just to make sure I don’t have that phlegmy morning voice. Is anyone going to call?

11:00 a.m. “I’m fly like paper, get high like planes…” My ringtone! Someone is calling. It’s a school in Florida. I’m slightly surprised but excited. She gives me 24-hours to make a decision.

11:02 a.m. My phone rings again. It’s another Florida school. It looks like I might be getting a really great tan this summer.

In the next few minutes, I receive two more offers. Two are for ACUHO-I internships and two for NODA internships. I’m grateful that I received ANY offers but a little bummed that I didn’t hear from my top three choices.

4 p.m. I get a missed call and a voicemail from one of my top three schools. I’m excited, but I’m not sure I want to be second or third choice even at a school I’m really interested in.

9:15 p.m. I’m finally done with the Wednesday gauntlet of meetings, meetings, meetings, class, and meetings. I’ve barely had time to think about where I want to go and I have about 14 hours to make a decision. There’s so much to consider. I feel like the residence life internships may be a little too much like what I’m already doing so I’m leaning toward a NODA internship.

I called my boyfriend. He’s in student affairs as well and accepted an internship offer right away. He’s slightly relieved that I’m not going to be in Alaska for the summer. He accepted a position at a school in Florida which is making my two Florida choices more and more attractive. But still, I want to make this decision for me.

I called my mom. She wants me to go to the prestigious east coast school because it has a big name. I explain to her that while the university has a great academic reputation it might not be the best experience for me. She wants me to be close to home. I remind her that I spent a summer in New York and she never came to visit. After talking to my mom I know I have to make this decision for me.

The whole time I’m thinking, I’m wondering where I am in relation to Perry’s dualism, multiplism, relativism, and commitment. And right now, I am a little upset with Perry. I guess he would say I’m being multiplistic because I think any of these decisions could be equally beneficial. Sure, I’ve weighed the pros and cons of each and thought rationally about the choices. Honestly, I think that although the internships are all very different, I could grow and learn from each of them. And while I don’t want someone else to just give me the answer, it sure would be nice to know which one would have the greatest, most positive impact on my life. Does that really mean I’m not cognitively developed? Ugh.

9:30 p.m. There’s only one solution I can think of at the moment. I’m headed to the gym to figure this out the best way I know how—with sweat and a lot of time to think. Hopefully by tomorrow morning I will feel fully committed and excited about my decision.

It's a residence hall NOT a dormitory - 11

I remember my first computer. It had one of those big disk drives for the disks with the holes in the middle. It also had a printer that used the paper with the edges that you tore off and threw in the trash. I think it had Word Perfect. There was no internet. I wouldn’t join Facebook for another 10 years…

These days, I can’t imagine life without a computer. I have a prehistoric laptop that has a floppy drive and no wireless internet capability, so I use the desktop computer in my office all the time. I use it to check and write emails, follow up on incidents in the building, do occupancy, keep in touch with friends and family, the list goes on and on and on. I’m even typing this blog on the computer right now.

Lately, however, my computer has become a pain in my butt. First of all, the computer turns off at 2 a.m. every morning so it can back up files. I get that this is important, but so is my late night scramble to finish homework for the next day. Don’t even get me started on what I’m supposed to do if there’s an incident after 2 a.m. in my building full of 1,000 18-20 year-olds. And then there’s Norm, the IT guy for our department whose name I have changed to protect his true identity. Think of Norm as a mama bear and all of our computers as his baby bears. Norm gets pretty upset if anything happens to his cubs. Norm also has his babies protected from letting us download any useful programs (like Adobe Acrobat to help make forms or Real Player so that we can watch videos in the office). Norm also won’t let us use flash drives which is consistently inconvenient.

Recently, Norm has taken it to a whole new level. Anytime I forget to log off my computer, Norm will send an email about my environmentally-unfriendly incompetency to my supervisor, my supervisor’s supervisor, and my supervisor’s supervisor’s supervisor (is that confusing yet?). It may sound ridiculous to you but sometimes it’s seriously hard to remember to log off my computer. Sometimes, I am interrupted with serious situations and don’t end up returning to my computer until much later or the next day. As far as being green, the computer is still in sleep mode so it could be more wasteful. Anyway, the bottom line is that I don’t think my success at work hinges on whether or not I sometimes forget to log off my computer. I’m also almost certain that all of these supervisor’s have more important things to do than worry about my less-than-perfect log-off track record. Well, except for the one who keeps giving my direct supervisor helpful suggestions to remind me to log off (none of which have worked).

I’ve thought of several smart ass ways to respond to Norm. One involves emailing him (and carbon copying all the supervisors) every time I log off correctly. One involves giving him a piece of my mind which includes asking how he would like it if I rubbed all of his mistakes in his face. Yet another includes telling Norm that I would be more likely to log off if our out-of-date computers didn’t take three hours to reset and informing a certain supervisor that perhaps I could remember to log off if I wasn’t working a million hours a week. None of which I actually have the guts to do.

I’ve decided to be an adult and call Norm to talk this one out. I’ll see if maybe he can put a timer on my workstation that logs me off after thirty minutes of inactivity. In the meantime, I’ll just leave this on while I run to the gym…