Takin' Care of Business #14

Wow! End of the year...seems like yesterday that I just got here.

I want to take the time to apologize to everyone since I have been very MIA lately. It's been over a month since I last wrote, and I know I have stories to hear from everyone about internships and such for the summer.

Not much has happened since I last wrote to all of you readers. So far, my NODA internship in TX is still in place and classes are still boring. However, these past few weeks have been a bit stressful with the preparation of my final semester projects. So much to do, and so little time. Bring it on, stress! I'm waiting for you!

As I reflect back on this first year, I did learn alot about myself and what I'm made of. It's been rough to be living alone and to work and go to school at the same time. It's been rough to realize that some things need to change next year and that my attitude towards school at the moment needs some readjusting.

It was a year of learning...about myself, about the field, and about my relationships with people. I have always been noted for being someone who likes to connect with others. This is why I have always had meaningful friendships with people. Now that I work with students, I have had to learn how to tone it down a bit. It's been a challenge when most of the students I work with are about my same age. I know that when I get that first job out of grad school, I will have to more assertive and take things a bit more seriously than I do now (not that I'm a silly goose or anything, but being in a supervisory role requires me to be more focused and mature.

Lately, alot of questions have been coming up from those professionals in the field at my institution for us grads. We have a GA Development session that us who work for the Dean of Students Office have to go to once a month. This month we talked the job search....not too far from the corner. That's when it hit me that I'm only "half way there (whooooa! Livin' on a Prayer! Take my hand and we'll make it I swear...") Woops, sorry for that musical interruption :)

Job Searching: not exactly something I wanted to discuss quite yet, but the questions are still burning in the back of my mind. The major one has been "Where do you want to go?" Personally, I have no geographical location where I'd like to be. I have moved around alot in my lifetime, and so moving is not a problem. I'm a tumbleweed, I go wherever the wind takes me. Seems to be such an easy thing to say for someone in Student Affairs...because let's face it, you have to be willing to relocate when you're in this field. However, though most of my classmates have significant others, I have no attachment to anyone at the moment. In the past two months I met someone very nice, and though dating this person seemed like a possible progression...I had to stop and think that at the moment, I'm not in a position to be romantically involved with someone. Why would I decide to get into a relationship, when I'll be moving in about a year. Despite cutting communication with this person I was talking to, I realized that my career is always going to come first in that aspect. I know that's not a balanced way to live emotionally, but that's the way it's got to be.

My career will always come first with the exception of my parents. At the moment, I have two aging parents in their late 70s, who are going through different medical concerns. Though my mom is still walking around and gardening, she has numerous things going on. The amount of pills she has to take for her blood pressure, cholesterol, and other heart related conditions kind of spook me out. On top of that she has a pinched nerve on her lower back (which is why she shouldn't be gardening, but she is stubborn and won't listen to em or anyone). She has hearing issues, and other problems of that nature. However, my oldest sister is her caregiver, and despite her not being around much (because she works a day and a night job), I know that mom has someone to look after her. The one who worries me is my dad. He doesn't have any physical issues...heck, he jogs at the local park every morning. But my mom, sister, and me have noticed that my dad is starting to lose it a bit mentally. OK, so it's not full blown out Alzheimer's, but we think it is going to start kicking in soon just by small behaviors he does.

My mom and I had the conversation about me moving back to TX so that I could help my sister out a bit, and take care of her and dad. My mom is one of those parents that likes to use the guilt trip, but she was very honest with me. Mom doesn't want me to go home just to take care of her. She said "You go where you have to go, and don't worry about us". I know that I can't be picky in job searching with the way the economy is now. I have student loans to pay back. But, I have that obligation to my family. Parents take care of the children, and then the children take care of the parents...it's the ebb and flow of life.

My parents are very proud that I have made it this far in my life. I'm the first one to go to college and graduate, and the first one to go for their Master's. It's the greatest accomplishment they have done has parents...to guide me in the right direction. I know that some young people today don't have that support, and that is one of the reasons I decided to go into this field. I want to help students reach their potential. Now, when you mix cultural backgrounds in the whole picture, it can get murky. For example, Latino students are very close to their families (i.e. ME and the story I'm telling you just now...) So, I may not have a boyfriend, but I do have a family, and they will be a huge deciding factor in my relocation after grad school. One of my mentors told me, that I had to think about my happiness, and he asked me if TX was a place I could see myself in. I said "No". TX is not my dream world. And I understand that I'm only a plane ride away, but sometimes you have to make sacrifices in order to do the right thing. I left home to go away to college...I moved again to a place that I knew nothing about for grad school...and I will move back home to take care of mom and dad--becuase it's the right thing to do.

One thing I'm looking foward to with my summer internship in TX is that I will be able to start networking in the area. Maybe I can get a job after graduation where I'm going this summer. That can be a start.

It's alot of stuff to think about for the following year...and I still have time to change my mind about relocating. I think it's good that these questions about relocating came up so I can think about it early on. But they are some tough decisions to make. Hey, nobody said growing up was easy...sometimes you just got to be "Takin' Care of Business"...